Dysphagia, Anxiety, and Living Inside a Choking Fear
I’m writing this while I’m still in it. I’m still struggling to eat normally. I’m still hyper-aware of my swallowing. I’m still scared of choking, even though clinicians have told me there’s no obstruction and that my airway is safe. I want to explain what this actually feels like, because when people say “it’s just anxiety,” that phrase doesn’t capture the reality of living inside it. How this started This began with a real scare. A hair caught at the back of my throat and triggered a sudden gag reflex that felt like choking. It passed quickly, but my body didn’t forget it. From that moment, my nervous system went into full alarm mode. Since then, swallowing hasn’t felt automatic. What dysphagia feels like for me right now My swallowing still works, but it doesn’t feel reliable. When I’m calmer, I can eat solid food — I’ve eaten pizza, chocolate, and other foods — but when anxiety rises, swallowing feels delayed and unsafe. Saliva is the hardest part. Fluids go down more easily...
